A Hidden Life

You have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God.
Your real life is Christ,
and when he appears,
then you too will appear with him
and share his glory,
alleluia.

I did die. I am still dying. Until the day I die, I will always be dying. God made me to be this beautiful woman, but over time and through repeated sin I turned into something far from beautiful. God always saw me as beautiful, because He always saw that beautiful soul of a woman underneath the wounds and scars of sin. But I was deeply wounded and disfigured. I was very far from the woman He created me to be.

I have died to sin and now I live for Christ Jesus. My life now is so far from the type of life I used to live. I used to be living for myself. I used to be a hostage to sin. I used to collapse under the littlest burdens. Now I am free. As a free soul I have chosen to surrender myself to God. He has taken my life and my beautiful soul and hidden it. He does this for His own purposes and for His own ends. These plans are hidden from me.

I now truly live a hidden life with Christ. There is a prayer-life that never existed before. There is a depth to me that never existed before. My life is given over to Him, completely. I do not have ambitions or dreams to climb the corporate ladder. I only dream of doing His Will and one day being with Him in heaven. My life appears very inert, unattractive and tiring. But I believe it to be far from that, even if my heart feels that way sometimes. I know that I will one day have a share in His glory.

Why He has chosen for me to figuratively lead a hidden life is something beyond me. I am slowly accepting this hidden life and ever more slowly appreciating the wisdom of God in all this. I know in all things ‘God works for good with those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.’ (Romans 8:28) In this knowledge, I hope and trust and live.

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About Longing Heart

A young, Catholic woman seeking the Lord and living a hidden life in Christ. Embracing the simple, yet profound life of being single in the world. 'He has won us for himself...and you must proclaim what he has done for you. He has called you out of darkness into his own wonderful light.' 1 Peter 2:9
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